The Freedom Found In Commitment, by Rusty McKie

Robertson McQuilkin’s book, A Promise Kept, is the story of his marriage.  When his wife fell deeper into Alzheimer’s disease, he faced a pressing decision: to leave his wife in the care of someone else or leave his ministry.  His story is one of loving commitment as he cared for his wife until her death.

Of commitment he says, “Ours is a day of passionate pursuit of self-fulfillment.  And the folk wisdom of twentieth-century America holds that fulfillment can be found only in freedom.  So, if some responsibility or commitment, some relationship or value shackles, you have a moral obligation to yourself to break free.  But it’s a fantasy.  That doorway to freedom and fulfillment may turn out to be the doorway to a stronger imprisonment.  I’ve watched in sadness as many friends and acquaintances march through that doorway.  But such a person has broken one set of shackles only to shut herself or himself off from the soaring freedom of experiencing God’s highest and best” (34-35).

The culture of our day would not know what to do with a love like this.  This type of love is counter-cultural and truly reflects the gospel.  God has loved us in this way by sending His Son to purchase us as His bride (Eph 5:25-27).  This is the covenant-love of our God: Christ will never leave His Bride.

John Piper remarks on this in This Momentary Marriage when he says, “Staying married, therefore, is not mainly about staying in love.  It is about keeping covenant.  ‘Till death do us part’ or ‘As long as we both shall live’ is a sacred covenant promise – the same kind Jesus made with His bride when He died for her.  Therefore, what makes divorce and remarriage so horrific in God’s eyes is not merely that it involves covenant-breaking to the spouse, but that it involves misrepresenting Christ and his covenant.  Christ will never leave his wife” (25).

The world around us tells us that freedom, joy and fulfillment can only be found outside of covenant relationships.  Marriage is seen as the “old ball and chain.”  Sex is seen as more enjoyable outside of marriage, and the idea of giving all of yourself to a spouse or community of believers is seen as hindering and suppressive.  All of these are lies from the enemy, for covenant relationships are meant to point us toward our deeper purpose – a relationship with Christ.

The Bible tells us that we are always “slaves” to something.  “Do you not know that if you present yourselves to anyone as obedient slaves, you are slaves of the one whom you obey, either of sin, which leads to death, or of obedience, which leads to righteousness?… When you were slaves of sin, you were free in regard to righteousness.  But what fruit were you getting at that time from the things of which you are now ashamed?  The end of those things is death.  But now that you have been set free from sin and have become slaves of God, the fruit you get leads to sanctification and its end, eternal life.  For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord” (Rom 6:16, 20-23).

God is calling us to covenantal love, and we, the church, respond much like our surrounding culture by running away from this commitment.  It is easy to look at a marriage that is falling apart and think that we would never let that happen.  But don’t we allow such things to happen on a daily basis as we search for freedom and fulfillment outside of our relationship with Christ?

“For freedom Christ has set us free; stand firm therefore, and do not submit again to a yoke of slavery” (Gal 5:1).  We must remember that the only freedom worth having is the freedom that comes from a life dedicated to Jesus Christ.  Our rebellious hearts often tell us that by committing our lives to Jesus we are forfeiting freedom.  Let us trust that God is good and that He knows what is best for us.  Let us lay aside the fear that keeps us from an intimate relationship with God and pursue Him as He has pursued us!